Olha o que acontece se você não estudar Inglês

Smile, because our life is short!

Let's laugh!

An airline captain
[Um comandante]
was breaking in a new blonde stewardess
[voava com uma aeromoça loira novata].
The route they were flying
[A rota que fariam]
had a layover
[tinha uma escala]
in another city.
[em outra cidade]
Upon their arrival
[Assim que desembarcaram],
the captain showed the stewardess
[o comandante mostrou à aeromoça]
the best place for airline personnel to eat,
[o melhor lugar para comer,]
shop and stay overnight
[fazer compras e passar a noite].
The next morning
[No dia seguinte],
as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day’s route
[quando o piloto preparava a tripulação para a rota do dia],
he noticed the new stewardess was missing
[ele percebeu que a nova aeromoça não estava].
He knew which room she was in at the hotel
[Ele sabia em que apartamento ela estava hospedada]
and called her up wondering what happened
[e ligou para perguntar o que tinha acontecido].
She answered the phone, crying, and said she couldn’t get out of her room
[Ela atendeu o telefone, chorando,e disse que não conseguia sair do quarto].
“You can’t get out of your room?” the captain asked, “Why not?”
[Você não pode sair do quarto? o comandante perguntou, Por que não?
The stewardess replied:
[A aeromoça respondeu:
“There are only three doors in here
[Só tem três portas aqui],”
she sobbed
[ela disse chorando],
“one is the bathroom
[uma é a do banheiro],
one is the closet
[uma é a do armário],
and one has a sign on it that says
[e uma tem uma placa que diz]
‘Do Not Disturb’! ['Não Perturbe'!]“

What???

BE HAPPY!

Have a good week!

The James Brown Alarm Clock

Have a happy weekend!

Yesterday...

Woman's International Day!

Mennnnnnn!!!!!!!!

Meaning of Success

At Age 4...... Success is..... Not peeing in your pants

At Age 6...... Success is..... Finding your way home - From school

At Age 12.... Success is... Having friends

At Age 18.... Success is... Having a driver's license

At Age 20..... Success is ... Having money

At Age 35..... Success is... Having money

At Age 45.....Success is... Having money

At Age 55...... Success is... Having money

At Age 60.....Success is.... Having money

At Age 65..... Success is... Keeping a driver's license

At Age 70.....Success is... Having friends

At Age 75.....Success is ... Finding your way home - From anywhere

At Age 80.....Success is... Not peeing in your pants

Let's laugh!

Just joking, ok?

JOKES: let's laugh!

At School
________________

The Science Teacher

The science teacher explained to his class that long waves can go round objects but short waves cannot. Seeing blank faces, he picked up his hat, held it in front of his face and asked the nearest pupil, "Can you see my face?"
"No sir."
"Can you hear my voice?"
"Yes sir."
"What does that show?" He hoped for the answer that sound waves are long and light waves short, but the boy retorted hopefully,
"You're talking through your hat, sir." *

*be talking through your hat = to talk nonsense - to be talking about a subject as if you know a lot about it when in fact you know very little.
___________________

Good Manners

A teacher was giving her class of small children a lesson on good manners.
"Suppose, by mistake, you step on a lady's foot. What do you do?"
"I say pardon me."
"Very good. Now suppose the lady, to reward you, gives you a coin. What do you do?"
"Step on the other foot to get a second one."
_____________________

Don't generalize

In a school in the States, the teacher had just described Christopher Columbus' discovery of America.
"Just imagine, children, if he had not risked the ocean, you would not be here today. Wasn't he marvellous?"
All the children cheered, except one.
"Aren't you pleased young fellow?"
"No miss."
"Why?"
"I'm an Indian."
__________________________________

From here:
http://www.solinguainglesa.com.br/


If you're laughing, you understood the joke...
(Se você está rindo, você entendeu a piada...)

Cats do whatever they want!*

*Tradução:

Gatos fazem tudo o que eles querem!

Eu sou um gato!

Eu vou me deitar bem aqui.

No meio do corredor. rs

Time for Fun!

Have a nice week!

Let's read!

Leia em voz alta:

Três bruxas olham para três relógios Swatch. Qual bruxa olha para qual relógio Swatch?

E agora em inglês:

Three witches watch three Swatch watches. Which witch watch which Swatch watch?

Foi fácil?

Então agora para os especialistas.

Três bruxas suecas e transexuais olham para os botões de três relógios Swatch suíços. Qual bruxa sueca transexual olha para qual botão de qual relógio Swatch suíço?

E agora em inglês:

Three Swedish switched witches watch three Swiss Swatch watch switches. Which Swedish switched witch watch which Swiss Swatch watch witch?

Conseguiram?

Não??!!

Então pronto! Parem de dizer que a Língua Portuguesa é complicada! !!!